Honest Scrapping

Jo gave me this spiffy award (or nominated me, I’m not really sure).  Thanks, Jo!

Here are the rules:

1) Choose a minimum of 7 blogs that you find brilliant in content or design.

2) Show the 7 winners names and links on your blog, and leave a comment informing them that they were prized with “Honest Scrap.” Well, there’s no prize, but they can keep the nifty icon.

3) List at least 10 honest things about yourself.

So here goes:

1) I probably shouldn’t have a favorite, but my oldest niece is totally my favorite of my nieces and nephew and I often wish she were my daughter, which I never do with any of the others.

2) I feel really uncomfortable with comments on my physical appearance, specifically my body, either positive or negative.  Generally, an “I like that shirt,” is ok, but “You’ve lost weight!  You look great!” makes me squirm.  I really wish that we could focus less on the way women look and more on, oh, just about anything else.

3)  I gave up dieting a year ago and weigh more than I have ever weighed in my life, but may have a more positive self-image than I have ever had before.

4)  I have a very hard time attending to my own needs.  This is something I am working on.  I am actually seeing it as a spiritual practice.  At one point I would have thought that sounded very strange because I was brought up to believe that one should love God first, others second, self last.  The problem is, I never got around to “self.”  I only ever gave love to God and others, never, never, never to myself.  I have found recently that the more love I pour onto myself, the more love I have for others.  So I am making it a priority to take care of myself first.  An analogy that has been helpful to me is that of an airplane cabin losing air pressure; in this situation people are advised to put their own air masks on before assisting others who need help.  So that’s what I’m doing.  Or trying to anyway.

5) When people meet me, they probably think that I’m an extrovert, because I’m pretty good at all the small talk and at at conversation and at making people feel comfortable with the chatting and such.  The truth is I’m a MAJOR introvert and crave, crave, crave time by myself.  Without time by myself I get really cranky and tend to have meltdowns.

6) I am really, really picky about who my friends are.  I am really picky about who I want to spend time with.  This is related to #5.  The problem is that Mr. X has much more of a need to socialize and is much less picky, so I often get stuck hanging out with people who wouldn’t be my first choice, and then they use up all my social energy and I don’t have any left to seek out people who would be my first choice.  I have gotten better at saying “no” and just staying home by myself, though.

7)  I have migraines all the time.  Multiple times a week.  I should have gotten serious medical attention about them long ago, but I have been getting by on im.itrex (a third of a pill usually takes care of it) for a long time.  Most people don’t even know when I’ve got one, or I’ve taken the medication for one.  Lately, due to all the stress (I think), they have gotten considerably worse, and I’ve run out of pills.  So, I’m finally starting to address the migraines with my doctor, other than just treating them symptomatically.  Someday, I’d like to do even more about them, but one step at a time.  (This is an example of taking care of myself that I was talking about in #4.)

8)  I am doing very poorly at my job right now, and am hiding it very well from my boss and co-workers (well, most of them).  I hate my job so much and find it very hard to get motivated to just DO THE WORK.  So I blog.  Or read other blogs.  Or do other stuff.  Almost anything but my job.  I would say I actually do my job about half the time.  I can’t wait to get out of here.

9) I always see myself as an outsider, even when I’m not.

10) I worry way too much about what other people think about me.

My “winners” are:

Eating My Cake

The F-Word

A Real Life

Were You Looking For Me?

Musings of a Fat Chick

(OK, so I only have 5, since so many people already have this award–I’m ok with breaking the rules.)

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2 responses to “Honest Scrapping

  1. I love the analogy in #4 – a co-worker who also happens to be an IF, told it to me earlier this year. It is so true and we need to focus on being better to ourselves!

    Have you tried acupuncture yet? I’m sorry if you said you did, I can’t keep track of who is doing what…anyway, it is supposed to be really good for migraine sufferers. My sister also gets them all the time and she is considering acupuncture now.

  2. Very honest answers! Dropping by after your visit to my bloghouse this AM!

    My dh and I are the exact opposite: I’m the extrovert and HE’s the introvert…It’s hard for me to understand how tired he gets after an evening with friends.

    I have serious migraines as well, and funny you should mention it, squeak by on Imitrex and Excedrin Migraine. My doc actually put me on Topamax last year (before I was TTC) but that led me into a very serious depression, unfortunately. I hope you get some relief soon!

    Good to ‘talk’ to you!

    Eve http://infertilityrocks.wordpress.com/

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