limping along

Well Miss Famous was let loose from her leash (love my alliteration?) by my niece and went on a romp with some deer the other day.  Ever since she’s been limping around.  I thought she got something in her back paw; my dad realized this morning that it seems to be her front shoulder that is bothering her.  Doggy-mommy fail.  She’s really quite pitiful–just laying around, not jumping up to see who’s going out the door, etc.  Hopefully she perks up by the weekend’s end, but if not, I will definitely take her to see the doggy doctor.  Poor baby.

I saw an old, old friend of mine yesterday in the nearby Big City that I hope to make my home soon.  This is a friend with whom I was close in high school and college and then things just drifted.  I kind of put that on religious/ideological differences, but who knows, really?  So, over lunch I had to go through a much abbreviated version of “what happened,” as we hadn’t been friends for a while before X and I even got together.  She did refer to X as a “sociopath” more than once, however, which kind of took me aback to hear it put that way, but is probably true.  It’s just weird to hear it in such a professional way.  (She’s an attorney and this seems to be more her kind of language than the social-worky–yes, it’s a word, I promise–descriptions I’ve been used to.)  Apparently this whole re-hashing was tougher on me than I thought, as I was kind of in the doldrums the rest of the day, but didn’t realize it until after I got home.

I really realized it this morning after waking up from crazy X-filled dreams.  I do dream about him sometimes, but normal kind of stuff, like we’re together, but nothing weird, like we’re at the movies or something.  I mean, I’d rather not have even that, but that’s better than last night’s craziness.  I was back together with him, and had to tell him to his face I was leaving him (which never actually happened in real life), then later we were sleeping in bed together and I was trying to avoid having him touch me…there was other stuff, too, which is now in that misty post-dream place and kind of hard for me to put words to.  Disconcerting dreams.  But very nice to wake up and Miss Famous was there and not Mr. X.

Today feels better, blue skies and all that.  There is some good news that I will share once I have some more details.  We’re limping, but definitely moving forward.

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4 responses to “limping along

  1. I hope Miss Famous feels better soon and there’s no need for the Doggy Doctor.

    Limping along is better then not moving at all! Maybe your dreams are a step in the whole process. Your subconscious is letting go. You’re still working toward your goal even while your asleep! That’s progress, my love!

    I wanted to give you a HUGE thank you for your comment on my post the other day. You saying I’m your hero made me all warm and fuzzy on the inside. I may have even dropped a tear or two. You and I have been through quite a bit this year and look at how strong we are! We conjured up the strength we didn’t even know we had. Thanks to our WONDERFUL bloggy and IRL friends and family, we are doing it!
    *HUGS*

  2. I hope Miss Famous feels better soon and that it’s just a minor injury and nothing that requires a vet.
    Isn’t it strange how much dreams we have can affect our mindset for the day? It always surprises me how I feel after having a night of bad dreams. Hope that you’re feeling better soon too.

  3. Give Miss Famous some love for me – perhaps she needs some heat and a massage – perhaps she strained a muscle.

    It takes a long time to exorcise the demons of the past – and sometimes they haunt us. When your old friend used that word – sociopath – it probably made you feel bad because, well, who can feel good about hooking up with one?! Nobody’s perfect but no one wants to consciously marry Mr. Sociopath, right? Of course, Mr. Sociopath is good at fooling a lot of people, isn’t he? And that would give me nightmares.

  4. {{{Hugs}}} to you and soft pets for Miss Famous. I would go one step further in describing Mr. X. I would call him a full blown Narcissistic Sociopath…and, I have a psych degree to back up that diagnosis. I think you are doing more than just limping along. I think you are making huge strides forward.

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