Monthly Archives: October 2009

this will make your day

Click this:  Pets Who Want To Kill Themselves

It may convince your pet that they don’t have it that bad…maybe.  Either that, or you can submit your own photos.  I think Wifey should, for the photos in this post, which MADE MY YEAR, and almost inspired me to learn to sew.  Almost.

famous friday: lazing around

Since my return from my, um, trip last week, La Famosa and I have not been doing much (unless you count her digging my underwear out of the dirty clothes while I’m at work and leaving them spread about the room).  It’s not been my favorite week ever, so we’ve been doing a lot of this:IMG_1353 - Copy

and some of this:IMG_1396

(Sorry for the quality of that last shot.  I was covering up the flash with my hand, and then I dropped my camera and broke it before I could get a better shot off.  Guess I’m getting a new camera!)

shaking like a leaf again

I wonder why?  Let’s see…

Monday I mailed my engagement ring off to my ex-father-in-law (it was his mother’s)*.

Tuesday I signed the divorce decree.

Wednesday I found out officially (per my realtor there was a notice in the paper–so I don’t have to take X’s word for it) that my house is in foreclosure.

I hope nothing happens today.

*

*

*

*Yes, the same ring that he told me to send him a few months ago.  NOW was the appropriate time.  And it was totally my decision to agree to do this now; the mediation agreement wasn’t contingent on it.  I don’t want the ring at all and am glad it is out of my house.  I actually laughed when the mediator came and asked me about it.  My attorney told me, “You don’t have to do it.”  I truly didn’t care at the time, and so I agreed.

show and tell: howloween edition

Show and Tell Chalkboard 2Check out what everyone else is showing and telling over at Mel’s.

This is all about how to keep your priorities straight. Ha!

I am the person who buys a Halloween costume for her dog, but doesn’t even have one for herself, yet, for that party she’s promised to attend this weekend.

I tried to justify it, by telling myself it was cheap!  Six dollars!  That’s it!

But really, it was the cute factor.  After trying it on her in the store, I would have paid much more than six bucks.

And to think, just a few years ago, I didn’t even want a dog.  And now just look at me.  Taking pictures of my doggy-ballerina.

IMG_1367

IMG_1392

IMG_1370

that being hit by a bus feeling

So the mediation went better than I was expecting, but as I was driving away from that city where I spent the last three years of my marriage, I felt relief, yes, but also an intense aching in my bones and a deep, deep tiredness.

When I got to my friend, Cherry’s house, about three hours down the road, I told her that I felt like I had been hit by a bus.

Well, you have, she said.  You’ve been hit by the divorce bus.

Another thing I noticed as I was driving away from the mediation was that the feelings I was having were not just about the most recent past, about this whole mediation agony, but about my entire relationship with X.  It felt like the book was shutting on that.  Our relationship has certainly been in it’s end stage for a while now, but this truly feels like the beginning of the end.

I don’t know what it’s like to be in any other marriage.  I only know what it was like to be in mine.  And this ending, this divorce, as bad as the marriage was, as detrimental as my entire relationship with X was to my very person, this divorce feels like a ripping out of something that has grown deep within me.  Something that has grown deep within and set in roots.  And ripping it out now, like a common weed, well, it feels like a lot of me is getting ripped out, also.

As dysfunctional as we were, maybe because we were so dysfunctional, I put so much energy, so very much energy into us, into keeping us going, into making him happy, into saving us.  The me was forgotten.  And now the me is all that’s left.

done

The mediation is over.

We got through it much more quickly than I was dreading expecting.  Basically Mr. X offered me the exact same offer that I put on the table several months ago and he rejected (he still gets more than his fair share, but it’s over).  And we all signed a mediation agreement that Biff, the super-lawyer, says that a judge will enforce if X gets snakey.

And supposedly the house is in foreclosure.  Joy.

There are some more details I’ll share later when I have some energy.  I’m still pretty exhausted, and still not home.  I’m staying with a friend who lives in driving distance of the scene of the crime.  Flying out tomorrow.

Thank you all immeasurably for your good thoughts, prayers, etc.  I needed them.

famous friday: goin’ to grandma’s

funny-dog-pictures-aww-gramaa

(Please take part in my survey in the previous post–pretty please?)

Well, folks, I’m off to mediation in a state far, far away, and so, Her Famousness is off at her Nana and Papa’s (they wouldn’t hear of her staying at the kennel!), but even my housemate seemed disappointed when she heard that Miss Famous would be leaving for the weekend.  So never fear!  There are plenty of human-folk around to care for our favorite famed-one in my absence.

So on that note, I leave you with a few photos I shot the last time Miss Famous and I were at my mom and dad’s (at which time they totally ruined any no-pets-in-the-house-credibility they had left–which wasn’t much by this point–as they mushed and gushed over her–man, you’d think she was another grandchild, and not a furry four legged luv-bunny).

IMG_1322

Hmmm...what's going on out here?

obligatory curtain shot

obligatory curtain shot

It sure is exhausting here at Nana's house...

It sure is exhausting here at Nana's house...

So, having divorce mediation in the middle of ICLW may not be the best thing for my ICLW success rate, but I will get to a computer when I can.  I will definitely be working hard to catch up on the commenting when I get back.  See you on the flip-side…and let’s hope my dog isn’t TOO spoiled when I return. 🙂

(I scheduled this to post ahead of time, so at this writing, I have no idea how the mediation will be going.)