Happy October ICLW

So, I was thinking, why mess with a winning formula?  If you’ve been around for, say more than two months or so, you probably know what’s coming so you might want to skip down a bit.  Here’s the jist of me, at the moment anyway (there’s some more background above under the Great Escape tab, if you’re interested):

Girl with issues meets Boy.  Girl and Boy marry.  Girl always knows they have problems (but, really, who doesn’t?), but does not realize the depth of said problems.  Along comes the evil Infertility and Girl experiences great amount of pain.  Girl is no longer able to keep juggling all balls in the air to keep Boy happy.  Girl gets therapy and starts to get healthier.  As Girl gets healthier, relationship goes down the tubes and Boy gets more and more emotionally abusive.  In Spring of ‘09, Girl gets a clue and gets out of Dodge, with the fabulous Miss Famous in tow.  Boy goes even more demented than before and does many crazy things, presumably to hurt Girl. In September of ‘09, Girl gets job in a nearby city and is able to move out of parents’ house (hallelujah!).  The change is welcome, but Girl still has a long road of healing ahead.  The most current drama finds girl dealing with boy’s assholery surrounding the impending divorce mediation (argh). Girl has wonderful friends, both in the real and electronic worlds and is regretful only that she did not leave Boy sooner.

So, I have a question for you, all you ICLWers out there.  IF is no longer the driving force in my life, but it does have a great impact on the way I see the world (and on the way things have turned out for me).  Babymaking is not in the immediate plans for the future, nor is adopting, nor even looking into to any family building options.  My question has to do with Mel’s blogroll.  I have  a feeling that I am in the wrong category.  I am currently in General IF, but since I rarely talk about IF other than tangentially, that just doesn’t seem to be the right one.  I have a little poll below to get your opinion on what might be a better category for me, or if you think I should stay put.  So, what do you think?

ETA:  OK, so the poll may not be working…I think it’s a problem with the program–it was functioning yesterday.  Hmmm.  Anyways, the categories to choose between are: General IF, Non-IF but Written by IFers (in Misc), and No Longer Trying or On a Break (in Misc)

You can put your answer in the comments–not as much fun as the poll, but maybe it will start working soon.


11 responses to “Happy October ICLW

  1. The survey is not working, Pumpkin. You should have your own category!

    “On a break but kicking ass and cleaning house in other parts of my life.”

  2. I like Heather’s idea! Sounds perfect to me!

  3. I voted for the “No longer trying…” category, but think that the “Non-IF” category would be good too. You know me, I’m a lawyer and can never pick one side.

  4. Happy ICLW!

    I voted for “no longer trying”…but agree that the “non IF” category would fit too. I’m not sure as I’m kind of in the same boat…I think my category should be: “tried for five years with no pregnancies, separated from my husband, now my husband and I are getting back together but still living apart for the time being and I’m still on the pill so we’re really not trying right now but once we get things back on track we probably will”. LOL

    I agree you need your own “Kicking Ass and Taking Names” category. Huggggggs to you!!!

  5. Glad the poll is working now!!!! Whatever you do don’t take yourself off altogether! Happy ICLW even though I am not doing it this month! 🙂

  6. I think IF would work, but On a break or no longer trying would be more accurate. You may try some day again in the future, down the road of your life, maybe- maybe not. But, right now I would say it is on a break. IF still has a part of our lives forever, no matter where we are taken. So, not completely out of the category, so either one would work but the later would seem more accurate. Of course, Geek by Marriage had a wonderful new topic suggestion 😉

  7. There are other bloggers who are on another path like you – once touched by infertility, innocence is lost in a way. But you are recreating yourself and I admire you deeply for your courage.

  8. Your new online ‘home’ is lovely! In terms of where you belong… you belong here, with us! 😉 I voted for the No longer trying or on a break category. IF is still a part of who you are, even if you are not currently trying.

    Take care!

  9. Have you considered “Marriage and Infertility?” Although you will soon be divorced, the infertility played a large part in your realization that your marriage was not the happy place you needed it to be. I think that infertility brings to light many other issues in a marriage, and that your blog reflects this. Just a thought.

  10. Well, I see my vote is in the minority! lol I was thinking that being in the “no longer trying or on a break” section might draw a different group of people than the other. Namely, IFers who have hit the end of the road, whereas that’s not so much the case for you. Mostly, it’s just your situation that makes you “on a break,” know what I mean? I guess that’s just my 2 cents!

    Happy ICLW!

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