I have a lot of mixed feelings about 2009. Don’t get me wrong, I am so happy to flip that calendar page over and start anew with 2010, but I am definitely happy that I went through this past year. And I am happy it’s over.
2009 is not a road I wish to travel again, but I am glad I made the journey.
At the beginning of 2009, I had just started blogging. I received my first comment on my new year’s post. I didn’t really know who any of you other bloggers were, and I had no idea how much I would rely on your support throughout the coming year.
2009 saw the final spiraling down of my marriage. It saw my realizing the extent of the problems with Mr. X. It saw me decide to leave him, and then leave—the most difficult decision of my life, and the best thing I have ever done for myself.
This last year saw me pass through incredible grief. It saw me through the most painful and demanding process I’ve ever gone through—my divorce. At the end of 2009, I am left with only two vestiges of my connections to X—I am waiting on my Jewish divorce, the get, and I am trying to separate out my debt from his with the mortgage company we owe money to after the foreclosure.
I feel incredibly hopeful about the year to come. I am getting stronger all the time and feeling more like the me I think I was meant to be.
If this last year has taught me anything, it is that we really don’t know what may be around the corner. What I am planning for, however, for the coming year is:
- taking two photography classes, starting in January and March,
- going to visit my dear friends in the Netherlands in April/May,
- starting therapy (as soon as my new insurance kicks in and I find a good therapist).
It will be amazing to see where I am a year from now. It will be incredible to see the positive changes that this next year will usher in.
Bring it on.